Thursday, November 21, 2013

My Dad is a Hero

Not long ago, about 3 months ago..
It was my day off, I received a call from my dad,
Asking stuff about his medical insurance
He sounded fine but I got a weird feeling
Why would he even ask about his insurance coverage? 
He assured me that he was fine, q-ing for his turn in Seremban GH
Okay.. General Hospital? Something must be wrong
After a while, he called again, his friend sending him home
He uttered softly "I think this time my fingers gone already"
I was worried.. Why would my dad even say that..

A few hours later, he reached home, with his left hand palm wrapped
I was all ready to send him to hospital, with all the cash I have with me
My jaw kinda dropped when he said hospital can wait but his hunger cannot
He decided to have his dinner first before heading to hospital
I was literally LOL, dad? Come on! LOL
So I thought, maybe it wasn't that serious, although it looked like one 
First destination was Columbia Hospital in Puchong
Okay, you do not have this kind of specialist??? The doctor in Columbia referred us to Sunway
On the way to Sunway, we were actually cursing and swearing the whole Columbia

Sunway Medical nurses received us with sense of urgency
Quickly sent my dad for a quick check-up 
However, only my mama can go in with him
My sister, my babe and me waited outside for half an hour
We were informed that my dad needed to go for some kind of surgical procedure
To either maintain the length of fingers or amputate them
............. What..........? 
I thought it wasn't something serious? Given that my dad rather to eat than to go to hospital?
Apparently I was wrong.......

#One week after surgery

So, the situation was kinda confusing for me
Immediately I needed to switch the whole situation to a serious and tensed moment
I needed to talk to the doctor
The doctor was either being honest or being impatient
"Uncle, this is Sunway Medical, if you think it's too expensive, go to GH"
After a tensed 10 minutes discussion, my dad signed the consent form
We chose to maintIn the length, but not to amputate the fingers
The nurses unwrapped my dad left palm, I saw his wound
Bearable to see, but unbearable to imagine his pain
I could feel my heart has that wound too
Thus, that night, dad admitted to SunMed
My whole family, we were quiet however we were positive that dad will be alright

#Not meant to gain any attention, it's just I'm sad..

The next day, mama assured me that things will be fine and asked me to go to work
I was about to fly from KL to Hong Kong for 2 nights stay
Before heading to airport, I was at home staring at the furnitures, electrical wiring, cupboard
My dad did all that, repaired here and there, fixed almost everything at home
I have the best daddy ever, he is my family hero, my hero, my dad..
With a heavy heart, I left to work with worries
Arrived into Hong Kong, I received news that my dad surgery was successful
Doctor confirmed that surgery was successful however...
If the affected fingers could not function normally, they needed to be amputated
Or, if the cell at fingers are mostly dead, self healing wouldn't work, amputate too
Sigh, what on earth is this kind of feeling.... 

#I pictured the worst scenario that 2 fingers needed to be amputated

That night in Hong Kong, I poured an adequate amount of wine into my stomach
I let my tears flooded my soul, I wanted to go home badly
I felt bad for what happened to my dad
I wanted to do something, anything that can reverse back these accident
But... What can I do....
My sister, she asked me how can my dad ever use fork and knife to enjoy steak....
That question, killed me instantly... 
Please blame me for imagine that we go back hometown next year for CNY
We have a big big family at hometown, so many kids and teens
I imagine my naughty cousins asking their parents
"Why uncle fingers so weird one?" ........... 
All these... All of these shit, I cried myself a river and got tired, finally slept over them

#2 weeks after the surgery

Visited dad in hospital after my Hong Kong flight
He was complaining the numbness and inconvenience to do a lot of things
He made some jokes too, still can laugh 
My dad, is a real man.. I smiled a little 

After a few weeks of follow-up treatments,
His conditions slowly getting better and better
Doctor explained that this is a crush injury whereby my dad fingers were smashed by a moving machine
The crush apprently smashed my dad index finger, one digit of it, and middle finger, 3 quarters of the first digit to pieces
Even the finger bones...
The above mentioned, none of them survived
The nerves connecting the fingers, the nerves connecting to palm were injured too
Full recovery? 6 months times

#4 weeks after the surgery

Things were getting better
Although, the index and middle fingers are obviously looking shorter than before
Accident.. We won't see that coming but we will hold my dad hands to go through together
That was not long ago.. About 3 months before..

Not long ago... Just 11 days ago...
I came home from flight, discovered that my dad admitted to SunMed
This time due to blood vein clots, almost caused him cardia arrest which known as heart attack

#It's so sad to see your dad lying on a hospital bed

Dad admitted hospital a night before, prior to my knowledge as I was still at work trip
I couldn't say that I blame my mama for not telling me
Previously, it was a finger crush injury, this time, it is life threatening! 
Heart attack! Hello!!!! 
Anyway, my dad, a little high in cholestro, one aorta 99% clots, another one 40% clots
Doctor said, my dad was very very lucky
Surgery was successful, coronary angiopasty
My dad needs a total modification of his eating life style and many more
Thank god that my dad is fine now

Dad admitted to hospital twice in 3 months time
This feeling sucks, I seriously hate it
Would it be too childish for me to ask "Why are all these happening?"
No one can give me the answer..
Instead of being emo again, I need to be stronger
Dear God, I thank you for protecting my family members..

#Picture captured 4 years ago, where my dad still have all his fingers..

Maybe my dad might have a little difficulthy to adjust his new life style
But I am telling you, I will do the best to ensure everything is gonna be alright
My love to you all, is eternity
Papa, please stay strong! I know you won't tell me how actually you feel...
I guess you must be somehow upset about things happened lately..
You won't tell me, it's fine, I can always find out from mama :p
And also.. I want to hug you and tell you everything is gonna be fine
I want to tell you that I LOVE YOU! 
I am just too shy.. So I blog about you, Papa
Everything is gonna be fine, next time, I'll help cutting the steak and feed you okay?

Appreciate each and everyone that loves you and you love

With hell a lot of loves,